Just a Little Something

Someday....I'll be Ok.

My arm is becoming more of a nuisance lately. The other night I had a dream where my arm started hurting...soon after I woke up in pain that made me want to scream. Last night I couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep worth beans. So after lying in bed sleepless until 2 AM I drug myself out of bed and put on some icy hot. It helped enough to relax me to get me to sleep...needless to say I now smell minty fresh. haha. I'm scared to find out what's wrong with it, I'm scared of potential treatment options, scared of surgery, scared that this pain will only get worse and never go away.

All these coupled with overwhelming negativity coming from family members who should be supportive has not made for a fun weekend. My grandparents see college as a waste of money. I've been told I shouldn't go, there won't be any jobs for me if I wait that long to get one....no jobs in the field I want to get into. If I go, I should really change my major....computer, you don't need one of those. blah blah blah. You should really stay home if you must go to college, moving away is toooo expensive. This is the reason why I need to leave...I have to get away from the negative side of the family. My mom's side is super supportive and all like whoo go Sarah! But I don't need the negativity. I'm already freaked out enough about this stuff. It's not the classes or the work, or the roommate thing that freaks me out....it's the whole wow what if I get a bad freakin' case of Bronchitis again? What if it's pneumonia this time? Because of my past rib injuries I'm prone to getting Bronchitis, Pneumonia, and Plurisie(sp?)....don't go getting yourself kicked in the ribs playing soccer kids. When I get knocked down with that stuff, I fall hard. This past year when I had it....I was in bed for a week...trying not to cough up my lungs.....battling a fever, nausea, dizziness.....couldn't barely eat. I almost passed out...shoot man, I know I was home alone suffering during the day....but still being even only an hour or so away from home is kind of like eeeehhh in those situations.

Well....I have to end it....the negative duo are on their way over. Great...