Just a Little Something

So I was bored.
20 People. No more, no less.
1) List 20-ish things that you want to say to people, but never will.
2) Don't say who they are.
3) Never discuss it again.


1. I miss our crazy antics from back in the day some times. I wish we could hangout more. I wish you didn't live so far away now. Well I know it's not that far but to me it's still too far. You're an amazing and a very talented person. Sure a little eccentric at times but that's really what makes me admire you. You just don't care and do what you want, wear what you want, and say what you want...even more so than your average teen stickin' it to the man by going against the norm. Never change...and you'll always be my friend if you ever need anything at all.

2. I don't understand why you do the things you do a lot of the times. Part of me thinks you just want a lot of attention because your sister gets most of it. Part of me worries about what'll happen next year and where you'll go. We've known eachother since 2nd grade....I don't know I guess I just hate to see you not being given the chance to succeed at something your passionate about. Although, I'm not quite sure what you're passionate about besides recieving attention from people.

3. One thing I'll never have the guts to say to your face is, "I Love You." You mean so much to me and you'll never probably know that. I haven't known you as long as some people but I feel that I can trust you. Trust comes hard to me these days so you should feel good about having my trust. You don't know this but you've helped me through a lot of tough times by just helping me keep my mind off of what was going on. We talk about anything and everything and I love that. I never ever want to loose that bond between us. I can't loose you. You're a part of me wether you like it or not. Please don't ever change, you're amazing regardless of what other people think. I made a mistake February of 05'. I think we both know what that was....I regret that all the time. It should've been you...and not him.

4.I've seen you change a lot as we've grown up together and gotten older. You've let other people form who you are insteading of learning how to be you. You've in a sense learnt how to become a combination of everyone else. It makes me wonder, why did you ever befriend me? Was it because the people you did hang out with back in the day abandoned you and you saw that from the start I've always been the odd ball out doing my own thing but still having as much fun as possible? It's frustrating. I pretty much think...No I know, that you're all talk and no action. A little tip...try some action. Be proactive about something for once....go out of your way to experience something new. Break out of the close-minded sheltered midwestern cliche, and no I'm not talking about copying something that I or someone else may be doing....get some Culture.

5.I took for granted all the opportunties the chances we had to hangout over the past few years that I've known you. Now you're gone and I miss you. I wish we could hangout tommorrow but I know that's not possible. I love you like a brother. I admire you for being so open and up front with me. It's given me the courage to be more open with people. You've truely impacted my life in a positive way...and I want to thank you for that. Oh and we most definately just need to go a nice long road trip sometime....hitting up as many shows along the way of course too. ^_^

6.You're quite an amazing writer, I fear that people don't give you enough credit where credit is due. You write so beautifully....I often think, Wow you're amazing and all my writing is crap compared to yours. I hope you continue to write...I miss reading your blogs, if you get a chance post more. Even though they were at times cryptic....they're still amazing and make me think. Write On! (how lame is that? lol)

7. You're probably the best relative I have....save for well my one Aunt and Uncle who don't have kids. Anyways, we go to school together now, and that's pretty cool. I remember planning with you how we were going to skip out on boring family gatherings and just go have fun. Looks like that hasn't happened yet...but give it time....it'll happen. Get more out of your high school experience than I did. Live it up!

8.You listened to me complain a whole bunch. Mainly about me being hungry or about someone else...mainly a certain teacher haha. Thanks though, I know it must have gotten old and you probably wanted to punch me in the face and just yell at me to shut up. You're really smart, I hope you're really successful someday.

9.Honestly, you talk ALOT! Mostly crap about other people. That is annoying and people find that annoying. Sometimes you need to learn when to keep your mouth shut. People get tired of you running your mouth. Especialy so early in the morning...I mean damn, I'm not awake enought to listening to people bitching that early.

10.I wish we still had class together. But sadly we don't have any this year. Nothing will compare to Sophmore foods that class was amazing. My Advanced Foods class just isn't the same without everybody in it. You're really creative and amazing....so don't let your talents go to waste.

11.We only ever officially met face to face once...and that was by complete random chance last year, when I just randomly showed up at your school. Anyways I remember the long summer chats the summer before my Sophmore year. Thanks for those. I'll always remember them and take them to heart. We should probably actually hangout sometime haha.

12.I've always wondered what ever happened to you. What school you go to now....what happened during life after pre-school and kindergarten. You were my best friend then and if I remember right you were a pretty good dancer even throwing money out while dancing on the table at our kindergarten graduation (or so the tape shows. haha)

13. You literally saved my life, and I can never thank you enough for that. You've always been like a big brother to me. You've always looked out for me and made sure I got passed to and such...Thanks.

14.Grow Up Kid...your not a young kid anymore. Whining and complaing will get you nowhere. If you want something done don't rely on other people to do it or buy it for you. Work your ass off and do it/earn it for yourself.

15.Don't be afraid to put yourself out there, You're really smart but you should speak up more and share your knowledge with others. Don't fear the unkown...try something new, who knows you may like it.

16.I hate that you tried to use me in 4th grade, I guess the plan kind of backfired though huh? Too bad. I'm glad you didn't stick around after 6th grade.

17.You honestly freak me out....stop staring at me. I thought we've been over this whole thing. Get it through your head...you freak me out and I don't have feelings for you. Sorry.

18.I like how we sort of just tip toe around what we were back in elementry school like the best friends ever. We go to the same school now and barely even acknowledge each other. Oh well. Our parents thought it was the cutest thing ever though right? haha.

19. I miss the things we used to after school. It had to be better than sitting at home everyday and doing homework. We were outside all the time doing all kinds of things. Now you seem like you've gotten shyer. I don't know, I miss the younger you. The kid that would play outside with me and sing Linkin Park at the top of our lungs while playing soccer.

20.The Pocket of Death....was by far the grossest thing ever. But I remember it well....and no my Dad is not a member of the Beatles. You too have always cared and are one of the nicest people I know.