Just a Little Something

Broken This Fragile Thing Now.

Today I feel weak. Phsyically weak. Mentally Weak. Just weak all around.

I don't feel happy or giddy like I did earlier this week when I was posting about warped tour, and my favorite sites ect. I just feel like I want to lay in bed...and stare at the TV regardless if I like what's on or not. I just want to be hugged...or held...or talked to. I want to be somewhat babied today. I don't know why...but I do.

I've been having flashbacks of what's happened over the past year or so...and everytime I have one, the feelings that I was having at that time just come rushing back too. I hate that. Because they aren't generally good feelings.

I remember earlier this year writing a blog on here about having the one person who completes you. I don't think I have that person anymore. I think all I have now are people who make me feel stupid, inferior, ugly, fat...ect. Nobody to give me a pat on the back once in awhile. I want that person who completes me back...But I don't know if that'll happen. Sure conversations are great, but you can't help but feel that that person is slowly drifting away from year.

Pretty much the only thing going for me right now is my good grades. My lowest grade is a B+ and it's Chemistry. Other than that, I'm pretty much going through the motions, I've got nothing else to keep me going. Just school. Which in a way is kind of sad and depressing. It's me, going to school, coming home, going to my room, doing my homework, watching tv/surfing the net, going to bed and then doing it all over again.

My body can't handle being awake for much more than 12 hours now. I find myself falling asleep infront of the TV like I did when I was younger and I always tried to stay awake for Nash Bridges on Friday Nights. The Funny thing is was that show was on at 10 PM....and yet again I'm falling asleep that earlier..say when Law and Order is on, or when ER is on.

So I dont' know...I'm going to be getting my liscense within the next month. Maybe that'll help boost my ego some. Hah, I can't believe that I need an ego boost. But I suppose everyone does once in awhile.

Oh and I have one free gift to give to someone on Facebook...and I have no clue as to whom I should give it to...